DEPORTMENT TOWARD ONE�S WIVES

Ticklish problems arise if one has more than one wife and if one marries often.  One of the problems, for example, is how many nights one should spend with one�s newly wed wife?  The answer is seven days if she is a virgin, and three days if she is a widow (3443-3449).

Umm Salama, one of the wives of Muhammad, tells us that when Muhammad married her, he spent three nights with her.  When he intended to leave, she �caught hold of his garment.� But the Prophet told her: �If you wish I can stay with you for a week, but then I shall have to stay for a week with all my wives� (3443-3445).

Though a husband should divide his days equally among all his wives, one wife could make over her day to another.  AhAdIs 3451-3452 tell us that when Sauda became old, she made over her day to �Aisha.  So Allah�s Messenger �allotted two days to �Aisha� (3451).

But sometimes the Prophet himself would ask a wife to forgo her day.  One wife told him: �If I had the option in this I would not have allowed anyone to have precedence over me� (3499).

Eventually the rule of rotation was withdrawn altogether by a special dispensation of Allah: �Thou may defer the turn of any of them that thou pleasest, and thou may receive any thou pleasest; and there is no blame in thee if thou invite one whose turn thou hast set aside� (QurAn 33:51).  Allah is very accommodating.  �Aisha, for whose benefit He really spoke, taunted Muhammad: �It seems to me that your Lord hastens to satisfy your desire� (3453).

author : ram swarup